Finding Balance: Counseling for Women Stuck in Masculine Energy

Do you feel as though you’re the only one who can truly protect yourself and keep yourself safe—even though you have supportive friends or a loving partner? If you deal with this issue, it might be time to learn more about counseling for women stuck in masculine energy.

When you become trapped in this role of being your own protector, it can be hard to live the life you truly want and deserve. And you aren’t alone—one recent study found that women are twice as likely to struggle with anxiety and severe stress compared to men.

But the good news is that deep within yourself, you already possess everything you need to break free. Keep reading to learn more about masculine and feminine energy, plus what you can do to finally find the balance you yearn for.  

What is Masculine Energy?

Masculine energy is a spiritual inner force that every single person carries within them. And regardless of our sex or gender, we all possess masculine energy. It’s associated with specific positive traits like:

• Courage
• Intuition
• Ambition
• Setting goals
• Assertiveness
• Logic and reason
• Driven to succeed

But some potential negatives come with masculine energy, like being controlling, overly aggressive, or just feeling like you’re constantly in “alpha mode.”

What is Feminine Energy?

Feminine energy is a spiritual force within all of us just like masculine energy. But as you likely guessed, it represents a different set of traits:

• Patience
• Empathy
• Creativity
• Collaboration
• High self-esteem
• Open-mindedness
• Good communication

And as with masculine energy, these traits run the full spectrum—they aren’t all positive. With too much feminine energy, you might start feeling responsible for the well-being of everyone around you, or may struggle to set boundaries.

Masculine Energy Can Help or Harm You

These forces we carry within us aren’t inherently good or bad—they simply are. That said, being too wrapped up in your masculine energy can ultimately be a detriment.

Before we go further, know that you being protective of yourself is not the problem. The problem is that you feel like you must constantly stay in this headspace, whether you consciously realize it or not.

When you’re attuned to your essence, masculine energy can be a wonderful thing. These traits can serve you in so many ways—whether it’s helping you land a new job, stand up for yourself, or rationally navigate a stressful situation.

But when you steep yourself in purely masculine energy, it can radically change your perspective on the world.

You may suddenly see your partner as a controlling bully or as another child you have to care for. Your group of friends may unexpectedly irritate you for no real reason. And across every aspect of your life, trusting people can become difficult.

Unfortunately, this disconnect often leads to spiraling even deeper into your masculine traits. You can find yourself feeling incredibly anxious and depressed, yet still compulsively driven to seek control.

Understanding What Being “Stuck” Means

We’ve all heard some variation of the old adage: “There are two sides to every coin.” That very much applies here—in order to create balance and peace in your life, you need a mix of masculine and feminine energy.

But when you get stuck in masculine energy, you can’t bring yourself back to that meridian between the two.

As an example, let’s say you’ve been putting in a lot of time and effort to get a promotion at work. During your workday, you have to be 100% on the ball, take the lead in every setting, and make logical, calculated decisions. There’s no space for creativity or patience.

When you’re stuck, you won’t be able to “turn off” when the workday is over. When you meet up with friends or your partner, you’re curt, you make all the decisions, and you aren’t interested in hearing about their day.

Basically, you can’t take yourself out of that “survival” or “alpha” mode—even though you want to.

If you were more able to freely flow between your masculine and feminine traits, you’d find it much easier to be present and emotionally engaged with the people who matter. This can also help you be kinder to yourself, improve your self-care, and feel more confident in who you are.

What to Do When Feeling Overwhelmed by Masculine Energy?

If you’re feeling overwhelmed by masculine energy, here are a few small things you can do right now:

• Pick a limiting belief that plays into masculine energy (like ‘Rest is for quitters’) and challenge the validity of that belief.
• Think back to when you were a young child and write down the positive beliefs you held at that time.
• Remember that your worth is inherent, and you aren’t any less valuable because you didn’t finish every task on your list today.
• Spend even just a few minutes doing yoga, meditating, or enjoying nature to tap into your feminine energy.

The ideas above can be very helpful during hard moments, but they often aren’t enough to help you fully reclaim the balance you’re looking for. Counseling for women stuck in masculine energy can help you get to the true root of the imbalance and teach you how to maintain inner harmony.  

How Counseling Can Help You Find Inner Peace and Balance

At Holistic Mental Health Counseling, we believe in taking a “whole self” approach to therapy. We don’t start with a diagnosis because we don’t believe these labels are necessary for you to find the balance you’re searching for.